I was first diagnosed with chronic depression back in 2010. I had just spent a year on exchange in Sweden and coming back just broke me. My boyfriend at the time kicked me out of home and I felt disconnected from all of my uni friends because my studies were no longer on par with… Continue reading 8 years of depression
Category: depression
Broken Ankle update
I broke my ankle just over 3 months ago now. It happened early December while indoor rock climbing (I fell off a wall). I’m recovering slowly and it’s nice to see the healing progress. It’s still really slow though. Before you ask about belay’s and harnesses, I was bouldering (so there weren’t any harnesses/belay’s) and… Continue reading Broken Ankle update
Broken ankle’s impact on a broken mind
Nearly two weeks ago I broke my ankle. I had a fall while indoor rock climbing (bouldering). There are no harnesses; bouldering is just climbing up to about 2 metres and there’s lots of soft mats to fall onto. I was climbing over a corner, reaching for the last hold and I didn’t quite have… Continue reading Broken ankle’s impact on a broken mind
Hackathon Fatigue
I’m currently participating in GovHack 2017 at the Sydney location (add a 2017 year in review link like this 2016 one when available). It’s the first hackathon I’ve attended this year. When I first moved to Sydney 4 years ago I participated in 4-5 hackathons the first year and it’s slowly died down since then.… Continue reading Hackathon Fatigue
Most. Stressful. Day.
Let me tell you a story about a stressful day that I had today. I think it’s the most stressed I’ve ever felt. This story actually started a few weeks ago. I was riding my motorbike from Sydney to Cairns. I get up there with no problems. On the way back on Friday the 30th… Continue reading Most. Stressful. Day.
Letters to darkness
I sit here and I reflect, How did I let you back in? you are not welcome here all you bring is misery & hate you make me hate myself you make me feel like a failure I did not invite you yet you came anyway you are always testing me waiting to… Continue reading Letters to darkness
Mental Health Strategy
I need to improve my mental and physical health. I have gained over 20kg in the last 18 months. I feel like all of the hard work that I put in when I first moved to Sydney has been undone. I often feel fat, lazy and out of control with my behaviour. I feel like… Continue reading Mental Health Strategy
My Cycle of Misery
I had a depressive episode today, thankfully it only lasted an hour or so. When my depression has been at its worst, a depressive episode could last all day and sometimes not involve a trigger. My episodes usually involve me uncontrollably breaking down into tears and I will cycle back into tears when the bad thoughts… Continue reading My Cycle of Misery
my mindfulness stuff
I gave a short 5 minute talk about my depression in front of my whole company 2 weeks ago. I’ll take this opportunity to share what helps me try to practice mindfulness. Mindfulness and cognitive behavioural therapy is part of my treatment. It might not necessarily work for you but I think seeking professional help is… Continue reading my mindfulness stuff
My Perpetual incomplete list of things to do
mental heI have this perpetual list of incomplete stuff to do in my head and it constantly makes me feel like a failure. It makes it hard to acknowledge achievements when it feels like a never ending list. When I’m going through bouts of depression this list gets overwhelming. Here’s an example of stuff that’s… Continue reading My Perpetual incomplete list of things to do