I’ve now been aware of a persistent low mood for around 2 months now. Here is a poem to reflect on the persistent feeling of not wanting to exist. It constantly washes over me during the day. This is not a feeling I want to act on, I know it doesn’t make any sense, overall my life is pretty awesome (except for these thoughts and a few other things) but if you feel like acting on these types of thoughts please reach out to lifeline on 13 11 14 or anyone other related service. The last time I wrote a poem about depression was in 2016.
Can I Just not exist right now, k thx.
This thought sneaks in as I stand in line at the supermarket.
How about if the world just swallowed me up, k thnx.
Then I wouldn’t have to exists with these thoughts.
Why do I not want to exist?
There’s nothing in life that should be causing this.
Can I Just not exist right now, k thnx.
As I wait for the bus I think about disappearing.
How about numbing the pain?
Beer and the internet in my pocket help me forgot myself.
Staring into the void, I still want to exist in the future
But can I just not exists right now? k thnx